16. This exercise is meant to test your ability to analyze and reproduce material for reading and retelling.
a) Read the jokes silently to make sure you understand each sentence. Underline the sentence expressing the essence of the joke. Split up each sentence into intonation groups if necessary. Locate the communicative centre of each sentence. Mark the stresses and tunes, concentrating your attention on the attitude expressed. It is not expected that each student will mark the story in exactly the same way. Discuss your variants in class. The teacher will help you to choose the best variant. Practise your corrected variant for test reading.
b) Retell the jokes in your own words:
No Music Lessons
Once the teacher asked his pupil: "Bobby, how many fingers have you?" The pupil answered at once: "I have ten fingers."
The teacher asked him another question: "Well, if four were missing what would you have then?" "No music lessons," was the answer.
At the Lessen
"Well, Alex, how much is two plus one?" asked the teacher, "I don't know, sir," answered the boy. "Well, Alex! Fancy I give you two dogs and then one dog more. Mow many dogs have you now?" "Four dogs," the boy answered timidly. "Why, Alex?" "Because I have one dog already, sir."
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One morning a boy was going by a London bus to school. He had a cold and was sniffing all the time and so loudly that the people began to look at him and shake their heads. An old gentleman was sitting next to the boy. He suffered the boy's sniffing for some time but at last lost his patience and said: "Haven't you got a handkerchief, my boy?"
"Yes, I've got a clean handkerchief in my pocket," said the boy, "but I can't let you have it. Mother says it is not polite to ask anybody for a handkerchief. You must use your own."
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